Small penises have feelings too.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
