U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
