i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize