i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
