Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
