Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
