just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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