So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
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