Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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