Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
