doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Floor bacon is actually really good
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Randomize