You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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