This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
