Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
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