He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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