we're blogging at a bar
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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