I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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