Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
