Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
