i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Randomize
