It's like God shit irony all over that family
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
