i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Randomize