Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Oh god it's open bar.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
