I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
