Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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