im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
