I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
as a side note pls kill me
Randomize
