dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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