what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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