just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
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