I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
