She is in my trunk
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize