check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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