FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
