And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
