i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Randomize
