Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize
