We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
