Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I can tuck mytits in my pants
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
The feeling are messing with the penis
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
