Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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