At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
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