My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize