just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I just found a bag of teeth...
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
