i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
