Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
