she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
