so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
honey bunches of taint.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
