You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
