There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize