You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Randomize
